Breast Cancer Surviving/Thriving - Magic Happens!

I just had my four month post chemo appointment with my oncologist and everything is looking just ducky.  All of my blood counts were in the normal range and physical examination went well.  No worries and no concerns.  Great feeling!

Recently, I decided to step outside of my comfort level and venture off on my own to another state to attend a breast cancer survivors retreat.  I had not attended any support groups during my treatments and thought it would be interesting to get together with other women who have gone through breast cancer treatment and see how they were handling things on the other side.  There are so many questions when you are going through treatments, and just as many when you have completed.

I attended the retreat last weekend.  It was put on by the Image Reborn Foundation.  They sponsored a weekend getaway in Park City, Utah for eight women to get together and spend a weekend bonding and being completely pampered.   I remember prior to the trip feeling a little bit apprehensive about the whole thing.  What would it be like?  Would it be fun or awkward?  It ended up being simply magical and just what I needed.  My husband dropped me off at the airport Friday morning and off I went to Utah.  Transportation was provided for me from SLC airport to the retreat site.  Everything was perfectly organized.  I was whisked to the top of the mountain, a ski resort in Park City to the most beautiful home I have ever seen.  It was massive (about 20,000 sq. ft, 21 bathrooms, not sure how many bedrooms and every amenity you can imagine).  I was the first of the eight women to arrive.  I received a tour of the home and was shown to my private bedroom/bathroom and was surprised by an array of gifts left on my bed.

A short while later, the other women began to arrive.  Everyone was shown the house and their rooms and we began to congregate in the great room area of the house.  It was amazing, but all eight of us instantly bonded and it seemed as though we had been good friends for a very long time.  I was surprised at how comfortable and relaxed it all was.  There is something about this disease that bonds those of us who were destined to go through it.  Although we all were diagnosed and treated for breast cancer, everyone's story was very different.  We spent the weekend talking, laughing, eating gourmet meals, doing yoga, getting facials and massages, relaxing in the hot tub and of course, drinking wine in front of the huge fireplace.  It was an experience I won't soon forget.

I met some fabulous women.  I came away with some new friends that I hope to keep in touch with for many years to come, and one special person in particular that I really connected with and already have plans to attend a thriver's cruise early next year with.  The women at the Image Reborn Foundation were the warmest people who made every part of the weekend amazing.  No detail was overlooked.  And last but not least, I cannot get over the generosity of the lovely family that donated their home to all of us to come and stay for the weekend.  The kindness and generosity of people like these never ceases to amaze me.

I came away from the weekend feeling stronger for going out of my comfort zone and doing something different.  I feel enriched by the connections that I made and it did me a world of good to get together with others that knew exactly what I had been through and the challenges that we all faced and continue to face together.  It was an amazing experience and I am grateful to have been able to be a part of it.  Life does go on after cancer and it is a good life indeed.

4 months post chemo and feeling good!

Today marks four months post chemo.  I am feeling pretty darned good and the hair is growing back slowly but surely.  It's truly amazing how the body can repair itself and recover from something so hard and toxic.  As I find myself getting further away from fighting the beast they call cancer, the more I feel for those having to go through what I just experienced.  I have been very brave and did not cry much for myself and my hardships while I was going through it- but today when I was putting together a small care package for a friend who is going through treatments I began to sob.  I picked out my favorite scarf that I would wear when I wanted to dress up and put it in the package for her.  When Guy asked me why I was crying I told him that I thought that I had gone through this battle so that others did not have to.  I so wish that was true.  It hurts my heart to think of others having to lose months out of their lives to fight, well...for their lives.  I hope and pray that we see a cure for cancer in our lifetimes.

Surviving...and other things.

It's been a while since I've posted.  I have returned to work.  'Nuf said!
Life gets busy when you are able to get off the couch and out of the bed.

What's new?

- My hair is growing back - slowly but surely.

- I had the BRCA test done and have received my results.  I tested negative for the BRCA 1 gene and the BRCA 2 gene was not negative or positive, it showed a circumstantial abnormality.  This is a grey area that is inconclusive and the medical experts are frankly not sure what it really means.  In other words, there is a slight abnormality along the gene line for BRCA 2 but there is no evidence that this abnormality caused me to get breast cancer nor do they know if it is a precurser to another type of cancer.  Myself, my husband and daughter have an appointment to talked to an expert genetic counselor at Stanford in August.  We will be able to dive more deeply into the meaning of the results of the test.  More to follow...

- I had a follow up appointment with my oncologist a couple of weeks ago and she was amazed at how well I was doing so shortly after chemo.  My energy level is up and more importantly, my attitude and fears about cancer are well in check.  I HAD cancer, I went through the treatments to ensure that we killed it, and I can now go forward with life without living in daily fear of the dreaded beast.  The only worry is that my white blood cell count was low and we will be monitoring it closely.  It is most likely due to my body recoverying from chemo.

Coincidence, or fate?

I was attending an event an hour from home with my daughter a couple of weeks ago.  I arrived early and decided to go shopping.   While in the store, a women with two small children approached me and whipped off her hat and said, "Look, another person with my same hairstyle!"  We stood there among the racks of clothing and exchanged our recent breast cancer journies.  It turns out that she was diagnosed and ended treatment at exactly the same times as I did.  It is like we are members of a club of sorts - there is recognition and certain connection when you run into fellow cancer victims and survivors that is undeniable.  It always ends in hugs and comforting words.

Once I left the store and arrived at the event with my daughter, I ran into a very dear friend of mine's (who has since passed from pancreatic cancer) daughter.  My friend's daughter confided in me that she had just been diagnosed with breast cancer and was about to begin her journey through this disease.  It tore at my heart to think that after losing both her mother and father to other types of cancer that she now had to fight a battle of her own.  I have every confidence that she will fight and beat this nasty beast and she has a very positive attitude that will undeniably help her through this.  It was just such an oddity to run into her at this random event and to be able to share with her my story and for her to see me on the other side of this, looking and feeling good.  I am proud to be an inspiration to others and to be an example to show that one can go through the treatments and come out the other side to thrive and survive.  My friend's daughter and I both agree that it was not just coincidence that we met that day.  It was meant to be.

I am honored and privileged to help anyone I can get through the hard times and assist where I can.  If my experience can help or change just one life then I say it was well worth going through it.

Saying goodbye to cancer and hello to new beginnings

I just realized that I lost two seasons to cancer.  Fall and Winter 2013 were wholly consumed by the beast.  Life interrupted.  It's kind of like having a house guest for an extended period of time.  You have to acknowledge that the guest is there, paying special attention and doing all things necessary to accommodate your guest.  When the visit begins to linger a bit too long, you become used to the fact that the guest is there all the while growing a bit tired of the visit and longing for the end to come so that you can have your home back.  Cancer was my house guest for about 6 months from diagnosis to surgery, chemotherapy, more surgery and recovery time.  The visit has ended and cancer has gone and after all that we have been through, cancer is not welcome in my home ever again.  I feel blessed that I caught my cancer early and did not delay in my treatment plans.  It could have been much worse and lasted much longer.  Goodbye and good riddance cancer!

Spring is just days away and my favorite season of the year.  New beginnings - how appropriate.  New hair is sprouting on my head like the new greed blades of grass on the hillside behind my house.  A healthy blush is coming back to my cheeks.  This is a time of renewal and strength.  Nature has a way of bouncing back after the harshness of winter has taken its toll.

I have spent the last few months researching and planning on how to move forward and past all that cancer brought to me and my family.  I quickly came to the realization that there was nothing in particular that I did to bring the cancer on.  It was not my fault.  I ate pretty well, exercised regularly and was in general good health.  There was of course some room for improvement and making those improvements is something that I have control of and can focus on now.  I have made some subtle changes in my diet.  I will only buy and eat organic foods that are whole and healthy for me (when available), eliminate added sugars, eat more fresh fruits/vegies/nuts and protein.  I have plans to get in a more formal and regular exercise program along with my usual walking and weekend hikes with my husband.

My initial reaction when I began planning on what changes to make was to be very extreme and restrictive - going overboard on what to and not to eat.  Almost a panic mode of "oh no, I am not getting cancer again!".  It did not take me long to reel myself in and put things in better perspective.  I lived a healthy life before and I will continue.  Some changes are good, but to obsess and worry about every little thing would only cause stress and anxiety where it is not needed.  I had lunch with a dear friend the other day who is a two time breast cancer survivor.  When discussing dietary changes, etc., she turned to me and said, "You are going to live to be 100.  Do you want to live those years happy, or stressed?  Wheat grass may be some people's bag, but yuk...I'm not having it."

The key is, I believe, everything in moderation.  On the whole, eat all of the right things and do my level best to make the right choices.  But when the birthdays come around I will enjoy that piece of cake without worry or angst.  The occasional glass of wine that I enjoy is not going to kill me.  The stress of worrying about whether or not to drink it just might.

Hello new beginnings.  Welcome.  I look forward to a bright future together <3

2 weeks post reconstructive surgery...and, acupuncture.

Today marks two weeks since my reconstructive surgery.  Everything is healing well.  The top half of my body feels pretty good.  My legs on the other hand are still very sore where the fat was harvested from.  Ouch!  I'm still stuck wearing compression garments on the legs for another week, day and night.  I'll be so happy to rid myself of these garments - I picture myself busting into a rousing rendition of the song "Freedom" (think Aretha Franklin).

In the past week I had my first acupuncture session.  It was an interesting experience.  The focus of the first session was primarily on hot flashes, insomnia and general well-being.   The needles were placed in my legs and feet - from the knee down - and in my arms - from the elbows down.  I did not feel most of the needles going in, but there were a couple that I really felt - although once in, the sensation subsided rapidly.  Once the needles were in place, I was left in a relaxing, dark room with meditation music playing in the background.  I think I actually fell asleep during the 30 minutes that I lie there.  The needles were then removed - painlessly.  That night, my insomnia was actually worse and I had terrible hot flashes and night sweats.  I called the acupuncturist the next day and she said that this was not uncommon in that it sometimes takes a few sessions for the body to open up and respond to the treatments.  I go back again on Monday.  I will give it a few more sessions and see what happens.

One more week of taking it easy.  Restricted to light walking, no lifting, pushing or pulling.  At three weeks I will be able to begin to do more and I am so very anxious to do so.  I am especially going through hot bath withdrawals as I cannot yet submerse in bath water - restricted to showers only.  Which brings me to:  Detox Bath.

We are surrounded by toxins and chemicals every day.  They are in our drinking water, beauty products, laundry soap and cleaning products, just to name a few.  A detox bath is a great way to help rid our body of toxins and help us to feel healthier and balance the bodies ph.  Here is a good recipe for a detox bath:

2 cups Epsom salts (draws toxins from the body)
1 cup Apple Cider Vinegar (soothes skin and balances ph)
1/2 cup bentonite clay (stimulates lymphatic system to cleanse the skin)
5 -10 drops essential oil (I like lavender)

Soak for 20 minutes.  Drink plenty of water afterwards.

Enjoy!

1 week post-op reconstruction surgery

Today marks one week since my reconstruction surgery.  I had my drains removed yesterday and everything looks like it is healing well.  I am still very bruised and pretty sore in the chest area.  My legs are still a bit swollen and very sore where the fat was removed.  For those people thinking of having elective lipsosuction - don't!  It hurts like H*!!.  I am still moving around a bit slowly but feeling better and stronger every day.  I am now permitted to do light walking - so, that's just what I'll do.

I have to continue wearing spanx-like compression garments for the next 2 weeks in order for the skin on the thighs to heal properly.  Kind of a pain because I have to wear it day and night - but it's not that bad all things considered.

I'm looking forward to next week when I'll be able to do just a little bit more.  I will re-start my weekly healing touch sessions and have my first acupuncture session next Thursday.  I'm hoping that the acupuncture will help with my back pain and overall good health.  I've never done it before, so I look forward to seeing how it might work for me.

Other than that, recovery is going well - pretty uneventful and the results seem pretty good at this point.  I'll be so happy to get this behind me so that I can concentrate fully on my daughter's wedding planning which is going quite well also.

Life is good!

Reconstruction Recovery

The surgery went well on Thursday.  Everything went smoothly and according to plan.  I received a nerve block so that I would not feel anything in my chest area, was anesthetized and slept comfortably through the whole procedure.  It is now Saturday, so I am 2 days out of surgery.  I am feeling much better than I thought I would.  The pain is not very bad at all and very controllable with the pain meds that were prescribed for me.  My legs are pretty sore where the fat was removed and there is a bit of swelling, but it is tolerable.  The chest area not too bad at all - some swelling and just a bit sore.  I have a drain on each side which I believe will come out on Monday.

For the first 10 days I am supposed to be taking it very easy.  Just walking around the house but not much more than that.  At 10 days I can begin light walking, at 3 weeks I can begin light exercise at at 6 weeks no restrictions.  I have to wear spanx 24 hours a day for 3 weeks to keep compression on the legs where the fat was removed.  This will help the area to heal with a smooth appearance and will help to prevent any dented and uneven looking areas.

So, for the next several days, I will be taking it easy and following doctors orders.  I'm hoping for an uneventful recovery and looking forward to moving ahead to healthy and happy days with no more surgeries or medical issues.  God willing.