I had my last chemo treatment yesterday. I am so happy to have this part of my breast cancer journey over - lots of reason to celebrate! Each treatment was progressively worse and I do have to wait for this treatment to work it's magic and drag me down for a few weeks before I start the upswing to feeling better. I can't wait! The not-so-good news yesterday was that my labs showed that my anemia has worsened since chemo #3. My doctor determined that the best course of action at this point is weekly shots of Procrit to stimulate my bone marrow to produce more red blood cells. I had the first of these injections yesterday. The chemotherapy drugs basically destroy the cells in the bone marrow which is why I take Neulasta shots after each chemo treatment to bring up the white blood cells. Now the red cells need help as well. The doctor fears that if my red cells drop any further during this treatment that I will end up needing a blood transfusion which is not ideal.
I was really worried about taking yet another drug on top of all of the chemo drugs in addition to all of the medications that I take for the side effects of chemo and did some research on Procrit. The research and the side effects listed were a little disconcerting so when I went to the doctor today for the Neulasta shot, Guy and I sat with her and went over the pros and cons very closely. After the conversation that Guy and I had with the doctor, we determined that the benefits do outweigh the risks and the doctor ensured us that it is a commonly prescribed drug that a lot of her patients have taken over a much longer period of time than I will need it.
This day marks an end to one part of the journey and a beginning to the next phase. I believe that I am now cancer free and that the treatments did what they were supposed to do. For this I am excited and grateful. But...I will need to retrain my brain to accept this as fact and not worry over the next 5 years or so about any secondary cancers or recurrence. Triple Negative breast cancer has one of the highest risks of recurrence so this lingers in the back of my mind. A lifetime of thinking, planning and worrying about the future will be hard to change, but I will attempt every day to live in the moment and focus on the good that every day brings. Easier said than done? We'll see.
Inspiring words from Robin Roberts:
If you are depressed, you are living in the past
If you are anxious, you are worrying about the future
If you are relaxed and calm, you are living in the moment.
Words to remember and live by. Today I have conquered breast cancer! I am a survivor!
You will beat this, I know! You are strongest girl I know and you have many friends who are routing you on! Merry Christmas to you, Guy and your wonderful kids! Love always, Bobbi
ReplyDeleteThank you Bobbi. Merry Christmas to you too. Love you my friend <3
DeleteI am so excited and happy that you are finally at the end of the fight of your life! I have been with you in spirit sending love, prayers and good vibes. Now I feel like a burden has been lifted. This is the best Christmas gift for all of the gang. Continue to be strong with that wonderful sense of humor and a positive attitude. You and I will have a dance at Rosie's wedding. Love you with all my heart.
ReplyDeleteWedding dancing? Yes, yes, yes!!! Thank you and love you too <3 <3
ReplyDelete